


There's No Way

by Clarrisani



Category: Torchwood
Genre: F/F, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-31 10:55:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6467458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clarrisani/pseuds/Clarrisani
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a minor incident involving Tosh's desk, Jack sends Gwen out with her to keep her away from the Hub while the boys clean up</p>
            </blockquote>





	There's No Way

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the 2008 [ Torchwood Australia](http://torchwoodaustralia.com/) Writing Challenge #1

"There's no way you can make me do that," said Gwen.

"Oh come on." Jack leaned back in his seat, resting his feet up on his desk as he folded his hands on his lap. "It's not like I'm asking you to take her out on a date or anything. I just want you to keep your eye on her for the night."

Gwen scowled. "You three were the ones who knocked her desk over, why can't you just face it like men."

"Why bother when we can just fix it." Jack shrugged. "Owen, Ianto and I will have her desk fixed up by morning. What Tosh doesn't know can't hurt her."

Gwen sighed heavily. "Jack, do I have to remind you that I have a wedding to plan. Besides, I promised Rhys I would be home by nine."

"Then be home by nine. You'll just have to take her with you."

"Oh for god's sake, Jack." Gwen rubbed her eyes. "How'd you knock her desk over in the first place?"

"Well..." Jack resisted the smirk. "To cut a long story short, Owen accused Ianto of not being able to fight, Ianto got annoyed, I dared him to take Owen on, and I'm sure you can work out the rest."

"So why do I have to be the one to take out Tosh? Why can't Ianto do it? He gets along well with her."

"We need Ianto to make sure that the systems are running properly. He's the only one with all the codes."

Gwen sighed in resignation, shaking her head. "Fine. I'll take Tosh out tonight. But I don't know what you expect me to do."

"That's really up to you." Jack raised his eyebrows and began ticking things off his fingers. "Go out for dinner, go shopping, see a movie, stuff like that."

Gwen narrowed her eyes. "Sounds like a date."

Jack fought his amused smile. "Consider it two friends having a night out. It's about time you two got to know each other a little better."

Gwen looked at him. "Don't see you asking me to go out with Ianto."

"Nothing's stopping you." He gestured to the door. "Go on. Enjoy yourself. Just make sure she doesn't come back to the Hub."

"Yeah. Right."

 

***

 

"Did Jack say why he gave us the night off?"

Gwen made sure to keep her poker face in place. "No, not really. He just said he thought it was about time we had a girls night out."

Tosh looked at her. "Did he really?"

"Well... sort of."

"And he let you take the SUV?"

"He said that since it's been so quiet lately they didn't really need it." Gwen shrugged it off. "I'm not complaining. I've always wanted to drive."

Tosh nodded her agreement. "Can I drive on the way back?"

"Don't see why not." Gwen grinned. "Especially since Owen's not here to complain."

"Tell me about it." Tosh gazed out the window at the passing buildings. "You know, back before Owen joined Torchwood Jack used to let me drive. Suzie and I used to share."

"Really?" Gwen looked at her. "What changed?"

"Owen. He said that since he was taller it would save time if he and Jack shared."

"But Owen's shorter than Jack." Gwen paused. "He's shorter than Ianto too. Owen would still need to adjust the seat."

"Exactly. That's what I said. But then he said it's quicker to adjust the seat, wheel and mirrors when Jack drives then when Suzie and I did."

"Oh that is so Owen." Gwen pulled into a park, climbing out of the SUV and closing the door, waiting for Tosh to join her before locking the car. "So, what would you like to do?"

"Oh, I don't know." Tosh looked around. "It's been a while since I took any time off. I usually just go out for a drink."

"Well, we could do that." Gwen spotted something to the side and turned to face her colleague. "When was the last time you went shopping for fun?"

"It's been quite a while." Tosh looked toward the building. "You?"

"Same. I hardly ever get the time now." Gwen caught Tosh's arm, tugging her in the direction of the bright lights. "C'mon. Let's go shopping. Just us girls."

"Well, I don't see why not." Tosh smiled, allowing Gwen to lead her. "It could be fun."

 

***

 

"Shopping."

"So it would seem."

"Shopping!" Owen made a noise of disgust, looking away from the CCTV footage. "Of all the things to do, they go fucking shopping."

"Oh, I don't know. It could do them some good." Ianto stood, hard drive in hand and moving over to the new computer tower. "I hear it's good therapy."

"Still: shopping!"

"What would you have rathered they'd done?" Jack asked, picking up the last photo and checking to make sure the frame was undamaged.

"I don't know. Go to the pub, play some pool, just something more interesting than shopping."

Jack looked over at him. "Just remember this is Gwen and Tosh we're talking about."

"Besides, those are all things you would do." Ianto slid the hard drive into place, making sure it was properly connected before picking up the cover. "Getting wasted isn't what I'd call a good time."

Owen shot him a look. "No. A good time for you is probably making sure all your shirts are pressed, partaking in some twisted form of cyber-sex, or just letting yourself be Jack's bitch."

There was a bang as Ianto slammed the cover down, glaring daggers across at Owen. Jack sighed, rolling his eyes and holding up his hands.

"Okay, you two. Don't start. We need to get this place cleaned up by morning so that Tosh doesn't notice, remember?"

Owen nodded, scooping up the tray and picking up the last shards of the broken vase. Ianto glared at him for a moment longer, then went back to putting the back onto the tower.

"He's just pissed because I kicked his arse earlier," Ianto muttered, not quiet loud enough for Owen to hear, but loud enough for Jack.

Jack shot him a warning look, Ianto glancing at him quickly before returning to work.

 

***

 

Tosh grinned as she dropped into a seat in the food court, setting the bags at her feet and watching as Gwen joined her. "You know, this is kind of fun."

Gwen smiled, setting down her own bags. "How long has it been since you just went shopping without looking for anything in particular?"

"Oh, months." Tosh's gaze dropped onto the tabletop. "There's just no one to go with. I don't have time for friends."

"I know what you mean. Since I started working with Torchwood I've had barely enough time to spend with Rhys. I hardly see any of my friends anymore."

The waiter approached and both women ordered coffees, chatting about their purchases as they waited for them to arrive. Sipping hers carefully so not to burn her tongue, Tosh watched Gwen. Building up her courage, she set down her mug.

"Gwen, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, go ahead."

"What's... Owen like in bed?"

Gwen almost choked on her drink, setting it down as she stared at the other woman. "What?"

"I've... just always wondered, that's all." Tosh averted her eyes. "First Suzie, then you..."

Gwen tried to bite back her grin. "Do you have a thing for him, Tosh?"

Tosh picked up her mug, taking another sip to avoid answering but spying Gwen's amused knowing look. "So?"

"Well..." Gwen considered her answer. "He wasn't bad I suppose. He lacked imagination though. He had a few tricks but they got old fast."

"And Rhys?"

"Oh, that's different." Gwen shrugged it off, sipping from her own drink. "I'm in love with Rhys. Owen was just a casual shag."

"I see."

Gwen watched her, noting the look on Tosh's face and knowing the other woman had it bad. Deciding to change the topic, Gwen leaned forward. "You know what I've always wondered: what Jack's like in bed."

"Oh, tell me about it." Tosh leaned toward her. "I bet he knows a lot of tricks."

"I think he does. There's just something about him..."

"Sometimes I'm tempted to ask him if he's interested."

Gwen's eyebrows rose. "Why don't you?"

"Well... he's my boss."

"True. That's why I never say anything."

Tosh frowned. "What about Rhys?"

"If you were with someone, wouldn't you still consider it?"

"I suppose." Tosh frowned. "You know, I'm surprised you and Jack never have. There's always been something between you."

"That's what Rhys says." Gwen shrugged it off. "Shagging Jack would be like playing with fire. And if things didn't work out..."

"He got so jealous when you were with Owen."

"You should have seen the look on his face when he realised I was engaged."

They laughed, falling into a comfortable silence. Tosh glanced around as she took a long sip from her coffee, leaning forward again and lowering her voice. "You know, sometimes I've thought about Ianto..."

Gwen blinked. "Really?"

"Well, you know what they say about the quiet ones."

"True. That's very true." Gwen cradled her mug between her hands. "Has Ianto even had anyone since Lisa?"

"Not that I'm aware of." Tosh frowned, thinking back. "Sometimes I've wondered if there's someone, though. Just from the way he acts at times."

"He's a hard one to read." Gwen trailed a finger over the lip of the mug. "He's loyal, I'll give him that."

"He's also a gentleman."

"He's marriage material, although..." Gwen frowned. "There's something about him. Something dark."

Tosh blinked. "What do you mean?"

"I can't really explain it." Gwen shook it off. "Sometimes I just don't feel comfortable around him."

Tosh gazed down into her mug. "I'd do him."

Gwen looked up sharply. "What?"

"Well..." Tosh smiled shyly. "He is hot." She leaned further forward. "I once walked into the locker room after he'd been cleaning the cells."

Gwen's eyes widened. "Did you spy on him?"

Tosh tried to hide her smile.

"You watched him shower."

Tosh gave her a sly look. "I might have."

Gwen burst out laughing. "I can't believe you did that."

 "He works out you know." Tosh shot Gwen a mischievous grin. "Lean, but all muscle."

"I expect that of Jack and Owen, but not Ianto." Gwen winked at her. "Do you make it a habit of yours watching our colleagues in the shower."

"Not really." Tosh raised her mug to her lips. "Only when I get the chance."

"You surprise me, Tosh." Gwen chuckled, watching the other woman over the top of her mug. "So, ever been bowling?"

Tosh's eyes lit up.

 

***

 

Save for the drip of water, the Hub was silent. The three men stared at the screen as the two women left the shopping centre to deposit their bags into the SUV. As soon as the main part of the conversation had ended and returned to planning the next activity, Jack had switched off the sound being filtered in from the bug Jack had planted on Gwen before she had left.

Swallowing hard, Owen shook himself from his shock. "Bloody hell."

"Well," Ianto said, blinking. "That was unexpected."

"Yeah," Jack agreed.

Owen scowled, gesturing toward the screen. "What she mean 'lacks imagination'? I was willing to give anything a try."

"Obviously not the things she wanted," Jack replied.

"Shut the fuck up, Harkness. Just because you want to shag her."

Jack shot him the 'shut up or get a new job' glare.

"I think it's high time we got doors for the showers," Ianto said, shifting uncomfortably.

"So Ianto," Jack said, grinning and swinging around to face the other. "Would you do Tosh?"

"Well, that depends." Ianto shot him a sly look. "Would you be joining in?"

"Oh for fucks sake." Owen spun on his heel, snatching up the hammer and returning to trying to work the dint out of the desk support. "I swear you two can't go more than five minutes without trying to shag each other."

"Who said anything about shagging." Jack smirked, eyes sparkling devilishly as they slid over to Ianto. "There's a lot of other things we could do."

Ianto shot him a hot look.

"If you two don't stop it you can fix this thing all by yourself." Owen pointed the hammer at Jack. "Especially since this is technically your fault. If you hadn't egged on the tea boy this wouldn't have happened."

"You were asking for it." Jack planted his hands on his hips, inspecting the damage. "Okay then. Let's get this thing upright, then we can start putting everything back in place."

 

***

 

"Seriously, you've never been bowling before."

"No, I haven't actually." Tosh pulled her coat closer around her with one hand, rolling the wrist of the other to work out the soreness. "I've never had anyone to go with. Besides, I usually spend all my free time on the internet."

"You really need to get out more." Gwen looked at her. "Are you all right?"

"My arms just a little sore, that's all."

Gwen stopped, reaching out and taking Tosh's hand and inspecting it. "Probably just a strain. It should be fine in a day or two. The more you bowl the less it happens."

"Then I guess we'll just have to do this more," Tosh said hopefully.

Gwen met her eye, smiling. "If you're going to keep beating me, I'm not sure we should."

"Beginners luck," Tosh protested. "It was a fluke, I swear."

"I'm just teasing you." Gwen gave her a reassuring look as she massaged Tosh's wrist. "I'd like to do this again."

There was a silence, broken by the trill of Gwen's phone. Gwen dropped Tosh's hand to retrieve it, hitting receive and bringing it to her ear. "Hello."

"Just me," Rhys said. "Not interrupting anything, am I?"

"No, not really. Jack gave Tosh and I the night off, so we're having a bit of a girls night out."

"Sounds like fun."

"Has been so far."

"You all need to go out more." She heard him smile. "Look, I'm out with Dav and we've decided to go out and shoot a bit of pool and I was wondering if you would be able to stop home and set a tape for Strictly Come Dancing."

Gwen frowned. "Isn't tonight’s episode a repeat?"

"Yeah, but I missed it the first time round."

Gwen sighed, rolling her eyes. "Well, I suppose I could, just this once."

"Thank you, love."

Gwen hung up, dropping the phone into her pocket.

"Something wrong?" Tosh asked.

"No, not really. Just need to stop home for a moment, that's all."

Tosh glanced to the side. "If you want, you can just leave me here. I have some work to do and the Hub isn't that far-"

"No!" Gwen caught herself, but not before Tosh shot her an odd look. Gwen drew a deep breath, calming her voice. "No. Tonight’s our night. It's nothing really that important. We'll just stop at my place for a bit and decide what to do next."

Tosh nodded her agreement, following Gwen toward the SUV. "You know, you really must stop paying for everything."

"Oh, I'm not. Didn't I tell you." Gwen looked back. "Since Jack was the one that thought we should go out, I got Ianto to give me the Torchwood credit card."

 

***

 

"You gave her _what_!?"

Ianto didn't even flinch at Jack's outburst. "Well, you did say use whatever means possible to make sure that Gwen took Tosh out."

Jack glared at him. "I never said anything about our credit card."

"Ooo, lovers tiff. I was wondering how long it would be before I got to see one." Owen leaned against the struts where he was attaching the monitors. "Sorry boss, but I'm with Ianto on this one. I was there when he offered it, and it was the only thing that guaranteed that Gwen played nice."

"That money is for research, weapons and supplies, not for lattes and t-shirts."

Ianto's eyebrows rose. "Need I remind you where the money for your dry cleaning comes from?"

Owen smirked.

"I prefer it when you two are fighting." Jack sighed, dropping onto the couch and rubbing his eyes. "Ianto, have your got her system set up yet?"

"Almost." Ianto glanced back at the one working screen, fingers flying across the keyboard. "Just need to make sure her desktop is configured the way she likes it."

"And exactly how do you know all her passwords and settings again?" Owen asked, watching him work.

"Tosh told me." Ianto glanced at him quickly. "She said that since one of us is usually stuck at the Hub, we both should have access to her rift information. Besides," Ianto looked back at the screen, "I know everything."

"Ah," Owen smirked, leaning closer. "But did you know she likes to watch you naked?"

Ianto faltered slightly, a faint flush on his cheeks as he placed his full focus on his work. Owen leaned back triumphantly, shooting Jack and smug grin and receiving one of amusement in return. Swinging himself up off the couch, Jack picked up another replacement monitor and began to help Owen.

 

***

 

Tosh's gaze darted around as she took in Gwen's flat, admiring the pictures on the wall. To the side Gwen was fiddling with tapes, searching out the one she needed and checking to make sure it was in the right spot before setting the timer.

"So," Gwen asked, straightening. "What would you like to do?"

"I don't know..." Tosh spotted a folded paper on the couch, picking it up. "How about a movie?"

"Rhys must have put that there. He's been talking of going out to see a film for a while." Gwen leaned against Tosh, gazing down at the piece of paper. Tosh shifted it so Gwen could see, the two scanning the guide. "Anything in particular you want to see?"

"There's a couple of things on here that interest me." Tosh glanced back at her. "Maybe we should just go to the cinema and see which one is closest to starting."

"Sounds like a good idea."

 

***

 

"Trust them to take off somewhere with no cameras," Owen growled, glaring down at the mess of wires in front of him. "I thought we were going to go wireless!"

"We did," Ianto said. "Then some of the alien technology started messing with the signals and Tosh decided to go back to cable."

"Cables are faster anyway," Jack said, setting the vase down on the desk, admiring his handiwork. "There we go. You can barely notice that it was ever broken."

"So long as she doesn't look too closely and it doesn't leak all over the place when full of water, anyway," Owen said.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Would it hurt you to be positive?"

Owen smirked.

Ianto glanced at his watch. "Anyway, the movie ends in a couple of hours. We should have this done by then."

"And not a moment too soon," Owen mumbled.

 

***

 

"I quite enjoyed that," Tosh said as they stepped out into the night, leaving the warmth of the cinema behind them.

"It was better than I thought," Gwen agreed. "The previews didn't do it justice."

"They never do." Tosh paused. "Although, some films they tend to show the best parts in the preview and then the rest of the film is fairly ordinary."

Gwen nodded. "I remember going to a couple of movies where the previews had bits in them that didn't even end up in the movie."

"Oh, I hate it when they do that."

Gwen paused, looking toward Tosh. "Tosh?"

The other woman stopped. "Yes Gwen?"

"During that part where we thought they were all going to die..."

Tosh blinked, then smiled. "Oh, I was wondering if you noticed that."

"It's rather hard not too."

Tosh shrugged it off, continuing to walk. "I just got caught up in the moment, that's all."

Gwen followed her. "Do you always grab someone’s hand when you get caught up in the film?"

"Not always." Tosh smiled at her. "It really depends who I'm with."

"Right."

The smile slid from Tosh's face as she stopped, turning to look at Gwen. "If I did something to make you uncomfortable..."

"No, it's fine." Gwen bit her lip. "It's just... I wasn't expecting it."

"Sorry."

"No, there's nothing to apologise for." Gwen shrugged it off. "I didn't mind, actually."

"Really?"

"Really."

Tosh smiled again, beginning to walk. "Gwen, do you mind if I ask you something?"

Gwen glanced around, noticing that there weren't many people around at this time of night. "Go ahead."

"Have you ever done it with a woman?"

Gwen stopped dead, shock rolling off her. "Have I what?"

"Ever done it with a woman?" Tosh turned back to face her. "I know you've made out with Carys, but have you ever slept with a woman?"

Gwen swallowed hard. "No..."

Tosh glanced toward the SUV. "Would you ever consider it?"

Following Tosh's gaze, Gwen picked up on the invitation. "Tosh, what are you saying?"

"Oh, nothing really." Tosh watched her for a moment before sighing, shaking her head. "Look, forget I said anything."

"No, Tosh, wait." Gwen reached out and caught Tosh's arm as she began to walk away. "You just caught me by surprise, that's all." Gwen glanced around, worrying her lip. "Yes, I have considered, and no, I haven't slept with a woman."

Tosh's eyebrows rose slightly. "I don't mean anything by it..."

"Yes, you do." Gwen reached up, gently brushing a stray hair from Tosh's face. "I suppose, just once..."

Tosh grinned. "Just once."

Without another word, Tosh pressed her lips to Gwen's, pulling back just as fast to judge the other woman's reaction. Seeing none but slight nerves, she leaned in for a second time, this time Gwen responding in kind.

 

***

 

"Oh yeah! Go Tosh!" Owen bounced on the couch in delight, gazing up at the screen. "Go Gwen!"

"Told you they would," Ianto said from beside him.

"I honestly thought Gwen would make the first move," Jack lamented, fingers playing over the small of Ianto's back where he sat on his other side.

"Hate to say it sir, but I told you so." Ianto smirked. "You both owe me ten."

"Dammit." Owen scowled as they watched Gwen and Tosh disappear into the SUV. "Knew we should have stuck a camera in there."

"Actually..." Ianto caught hold of Jack's left wrist, pulling the manipulator closer and pressing a button, a view of the inside of the SUV popping up on the screen to replace the CCTV footage. "I installed it just before they left."

"Ianto, I could kiss you," Owen said, leaning forward with eyes wide as they watched as the two women began to remove clothing.

Jack looked to the side. "You wouldn't really kiss him, though."

"Right now, I'm considering it."

The corner of Ianto's eye twitched. "Don't you dare."

"How come?" Jack asked.

"I have taste."

Owen shot him a glare. "Hey!"

"Wow." Jack leaned forward, frowning. "Maybe you should do Tosh, Ianto. That's a pretty impressive move she just pulled there."

"Dammit," Owen said. "If only we were recording it."

Ianto smirked.

"You haven't," Owen said, looking at him.

"Began recording just before they kissed," Ianto said.

"God. I could do you." Owen caught Ianto's face in his hands and kissed him firmly on the lips, much to Ianto's disgust. "Your drinks are on me for the next month."

"Fine, just never kiss me again."

Jack laughed, pressing his lips to Ianto's ear. "Don't like it when men kiss you, Ianto?"

"I only mind when it's Owen," Ianto said, letting Jack kiss him quick. "Like I said, I have my taste in men." He sighed, glancing back at the screen. "You realise, of course, that this means I have to clean the SUV interior again."

Jack frowned. "Again?"

Ianto nodded. "Remember what happened that night we took it out and you-"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence," Owen said, shooting them a glare. "Christ. Some things I _don't_ need to know, thank you very much. Now shut up and watch the show."

 

* * * * * * * * * *

 

It was not long after daylight when Tosh and Gwen entered the Hub, blurry eyed and slightly rumpled. The Hub was neat and tidy, Tosh's desk spick and span as if nothing had ever happened. The men moved around, having fallen into routine like nothing had happened. Gwen sighed, tossing Ianto the keys to the SUV before looking up at where Jack appeared in his office door.

"You were right. We did need a night out."

Jack nodded and grinned. "Told you it would do you some good. Glad you enjoyed it."

"Didn't they just?" Owen said with a grin.

Gwen spun around to look at where he sat at his desk, a smug look on his face. "What?"

Owen's smirk widened as he leaned forward. "So, next time we go out, we going to do everything too?"

Gwen opened her mouth to answer, only to be cut off by Tosh's sound of surprise, the woman pointing to the flowerless vase. The three men exchanged 'oh shit' looks as Tosh turned to them. "What happened to my desk?"

 

 

 

**END**


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